Bill Shatner doesn’t need our affirmation. Scientists have proven that, at any given second, Captain Kirk is doing something at least 6.7 per cent cooler than what you’re doing. Remember when Ben Folds produced Shatner’s second spoken-word album, Has Been, and people laughed (recalling, rightfully, his absurd parodic version of “Mr. Tambourine Man”) — but then it turned out to be, like, really kind of good? Or, remember the unmitigated genius in his interpretation of Sarah Palin’s language-mangling during the 2008 elections? Or his slew of post-slump roles that reinvented him as television’s coolest ironic self-aware dad? Never mind meeting him: writing this, we increasingly wish that we were William Shatner.
"Check your data, Mr. Spock! A mere 6.7% is unacceptable. Kirk out."