Captain Kirk

Captain Kirk

Sunday, May 27, 2007

Marjorie Kirk as the Ship's Computer.

M: There's somebody on this ship who shouldn't be on it!

JTK: An intruder?

M: Didn't I just say so?

JTK: Computer, describe the intruder.

M: Well, he's kinda funny looking.

JTK: Specify.

M: I don't know, just kinda funny looking.

JTK: COMPUTER--

M: Now don't you get snippy with me, young mister, or there'll be no pie for you after dinner.

JTK: I! Need! Details!

M: Well, you remember that boy from Sleepy Eye that your cousin Lester went to trade school with? The one who got kicked in the head when they went cow-tipping, which they shouldn't have been doing anyway? These aliens kinda remind me of him before he got kicked. They got the same up-to-no-good look in their eye.

Spock: Eyes.

M: No, Mr. Know it All, I said eye and I mean eye. They only got the one and right now, the big mean-looking fella's using it. Oh! Doncha know the others just got theirs out of their pockets! Jimmy, you better get down to the engineering section. They're making a terrible mess--

(Kirk leaves the bridge as the computer continues)

M: --and I can tell you one thing, I'm not cleaning that up! Nosirreebob. I do everything on this ship and I don't even get a card on Mother's Day.

Inspired by Wildcat's suggestion. She always has the best ideas!

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